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NRA Rejoices In Another Mass Shooting
ROSEBURG, OR – Wayne The BUTCHER LaPierre and his cadre of bloodthirsty gun industry reptiles celebrated another mass shooting at another school. This time, an Umpqa Community College student murdered his professor and eight of his classmates and wounded ten others. The murderer, who was described as a hate-filled, anti-religious white supremacist, served briefly in the US Army, but washed out after only a month. Ironically, the Douglas County (where Roseburg is incorporated) Sheriff is actually a gun nut himself. He adviocated for arming first graders after the Sandy Hook shooting, and proclaimed that Douglas County Sheriffs would not enforce gun laws within their jurisdiction. He, like LaPierre, revelled in the shooting deaths of innocent college students. Alas, LaPierre was overheard lamenting the fact that every one of the victims had reached the age of legal majority and that there were therefore no minors among the dead. While this was slightly disappointing, he looked on the bright side and in order to cheer up his compatriots he suggested that maybe the next time an NRA member shoots up a school, there would be kids involved.